Am I married, no. Do I want to be? Possibly, maybe, maybe not. On one level yes I would like to be married; I could come home from my crazy day at work and have someone to share my day with — the good, the bad, the funny, and the disgusting. On another level no I rather enjoy getting to come home to quiet, talking to Pixel and Callie and enjoying time with just self. After spending twelve hours in the hustle and bustle of life, it’s good to be able to not worry if I cook a meal or eat cereal. When it’s laundry day, I love the fact that I can get ALL the laundry done with two loads, three at the most.
Recently I was at a funeral visitation for a lady from my church and ran into a cousin of my dad’s who the first words were not, “how’s it going” rather he asked “found you a man yet?”. How degrading as I sat there in my nursing gear because I had just came from work. I pleasantly smiled and said “why would I want one of those to take care of?”. He then proceeded to tell me that I needed one to help out around the house and do jobs I couldn’t do. Still smiling I kindly reminded him that I was raised by a carpenter and I could drive a nail and do basic “jobs” around my own house; and I could also change a tire and do maintenance on my car (even if I do just take it to the shop…I know how to dial a number). And why would I want to have someone else around that I had to pick up after and deal with when I was very capable of taking care of myself. It was not the most gratifying of conversations, though I did keep a smile on my face and I didn’t let slip all the thoughts that were going through my own mind (not kind ones to say the least).
God has blessed me beyond measure in my life. I have a job that I LOVE, it has put me in a position to help friends and family. I am able to support myself and travel. I have have been privileged to get outside the boundaries of Ripley County, Missouri, and even the United States.
I have family that I get to hang out with and spend time with. They support me in my endeavors. Other than asking about grandchildren or making comments about wanting cousins…for the most part they are good with me and my singledom.
Do I get bored and want company or noise on occasion, yes. As stated before, it would be nice to have someone to share my day with and to just talk to. Will that be my life? Who knows. But until it does become my life I will be happy in the life I have. I will not ask you if you have made funeral plans yet or set up a living will because you’re aging. I won’t ask when you will get your kids to be something in life and where you went wrong raising them. I won’t even ask you how many “honey do” jobs you have completed in the last week versus the amount your spouse has done (since apparently that a reason to get married). I will live my life to the best ability I can, be happy and content in the state that I am in, and keep a smile on my face when small minded people that feel that marriage is the only state to have in life ask me if I have found me a man yet. There is so much more to life than that.